Learning to love the ride...

My house is a mess. I have homework. I have to clean and vacuum the condo. I should fix up the garden. I should empty the planters. I should tidy my room, do laundry, empty the dishwasher, clean the bathroom. I should read that book for history class. I should print out the notes for school on Monday. I should make the dahl I keep promising myself for lunches next week. I should do the banking, transfer the funds. I should take wicket for another walk. I should be outside enjoying the sunshine... the last day of summer... it really feels like fall.

I love autumn. I've chosen instead of doing all of these things to sit on my patio, and watch the leaves fall for a little while. The rest can wait for another day. The only one it all affects is me... and I can live without it. I love sitting here, on the patio furniture I finally paid off on my credit card. Enjoying the sunshine, the blue skies, the rustling of the leaves. I love how wicket is curled up just inside the door. He doesn't want to be outside, but he wants to be near me. I just grabbed him and forced him into some family time.

Maybe its the hangover... maybe its the years of travelling... but its nice to be home. Its nice to have the calmness of the season wash over me, and not be leaving. So often when the seasons have started to change, its meant there's a shift in the way I am, what I'm doing, where I'm going. This time I'm here. I'm home. A calm settles over me as I relax and melt into the moment.

Today is a good day. It reminds me of my life in Coles Bay. The life where everything happens at a much slower pace than anywhere else. A plan is never a definite plan on the East Coast. Its always relative. Anything that 'should' be done today, can always be done tomorrow. Anything that has to get done now, can always get done later. I miss that life sometimes. I miss those moments. Here it seems like I have to force my body into submission before I can enjoy the moment. Wicket helps. He helps me stay comfortable at home, gives me a sense of purpose, when I feel like I should leave and 'do' something, he reminds me that I'm needed right where I am. I've never been loved absolutely unconditionally before. I mean of course by my parents and my bro, but this little guy's different, he needs me and loves me more than anyone else on this entire planet. That's saying something.

Today as this relaxing calm sweeps over me, I'm reminded that the wild-child within is bubbling to the surface. The line 'the calm before the storm' always pertains to me. I've been trying to keep her at bay by giving her peeks out more often, but I never know with her. She gets scared and takes it to the next level. The party-animal side of me will never go away. And you know, I don't want her to. I like that side of me, I just hate loosing the rest of me whenever she bubbles to the surface. I think I can keep myself in check though.

I mean life's good, and sometimes life gets crazy. Crazy's good as long as crazy doesn't turn into scary.

I'm not scared anymore. So life is crazy good?

As long as I learn to love the ride.

The only thing you can't buy is pussy... oh wait...

Have you ever gotten absolutely rotten drunk with an Albanian?

now I can honestly say I have. 3 Rotten Albanian's actually.

They weren't that tough. And as far as I can tell... they're terrible with the ladies. I mean I was batting a better rate than they were. They drank hard. Played shitty soccer. Went home early the next day. None of them got laid.

Suckers....

I drank for keeps Both Nights. Attended every soccer match with my game face on.

Buying drinks doesn't work... dancing does. If you can successfully own a dance floor without making it seem like you're trying to pick up chicks, and simultaneously make it seem like your having more fun than everyone else... you win. (period)

-everyone goes out to have fun... if you look like your having more fun than anyone else... you probably are.

WATCH THE VIDEO.

Miss C.

Sometimes you meet people who make you a better person than you would have been if you'd never met them at all. Today I wrote a letter to one of my dearest friends, she's one of these people.

It went a little something like this:

"When I think of my writing, when I think of my audience, I think of you.

In a perfect world I would get paid to write you letters everyday. In a very perfect world you would be sitting in the living room reading your book, while I wrote these letters. In a perfect world, the house of Essex would be on the Big Island and we'd all be beautifully wind blown, sun kissed and tired from playing on the beach. We would have fiesta's every afternoon, and drink delicious wine in the evening's. Our meals would be filled with delicious vegetables from the garden..a garden you made with your own hands. And the house would always smell faintly of freshly brewed coffee. In a perfect world hangovers wouldn't exist, time wouldn't matter and we would both feel completely fulfilled in our chosen carer paths. We would feel blessed, and grateful.
I mean... Well... I guess...I am sort of getting paid to write you letters... But wouldn't it be wonderful if it was legitimate..."

This was in response to an entire email filled with good stories and love... one line of hers hits me though:

"we are due for a weekend together... we are due for the world! right? or not... we haven't inherited the world from our grandparents we are borrowing it from our grandchildren? something like that... anyway... wanna ditch everthing and go to wyoming?"

She is my friend. She makes me a better person. I appreciate her friendship. I miss her.

In the news: Oil and Whore's

First day of school: Done. No. I didn’t panic. And Yes. It went just fine. My classes are all pretty cool, I chose wisely. So who knows, faithful follower, you may just learn something over the next few months.
Now I’m back in the office setting, counting the minutes, counting the hours, until I get to go to Calgary for the weekend. I was just settling into the groove of Edmonton and I’m off again. I did say I had the travel itch… I guess Calgary kinda counts.

In the meantime… let the learning continue:

Did you know that Suncor (a Canadian integrated energy company in Calgary, Alberta, specializing in the production of synthetic crude from oil sands) is facing environmental charges for a third time?

By Hanneke Brooymans, edmontonjournal.com September 10, 2010 6:33 AM

“EDMONTON - Suncor is facing environmental charges for the third time in just over two years. This time around the oilsands company faces nine charges because it allegedly failed to comply with its Water Act licence and approval and for providing misleading information to Alberta Environment about stormwater run-off at its Voyageur upgrader site.

In 2008, the company also faced a charge for failing to provide information to Alberta Environment about a contravention.

It's not surprising that Alberta Environment would aggressively pursue charges against a company that failed to provide it with information, which is a cornerstone of their compliance system, said Cindy Chiasson, executive director of the Environmental Law Centre.
"Generally speaking, pieces around timely reporting, failing to report and validity of information, that's the kind of thing Alberta Environment tends to pursue pretty vigorously because their system all ties around industry self-monitoring and self-reporting," she said. "So if you've got sliding there, then to some extent the system all falls apart."

Chiasson said Alberta Environment's track record shows that when multiple charges are laid they will ensure that if there is a plea bargain that there are guilty pleas on the company's failure to report.

Suncor says that in both cases there were fairly complex regulatory processes in play. Spokesman Brad Bellows said they believed they were in compliance with the regulations at the time therefore did not provide the regulator with a report saying they were not in compliance. "Our belief was that we were on side."

Their first court appearance on the current charges is set for Nov. 3 in Fort McMurray.”

Hmm…. Big business going down?

I suppose we’ll learn more as the semester progresses.

hey, don’t worry I’ll be back with more bullshit after the weekend… the drama lives on, even though the learning continues.


Read more:

http://www.edmontonjournal.com/technology/Suncor+faces+environmental+charge+third+time/3502243/story.html#ixzz0z8PslAYe

Oh and here's another bad guy:

Edmonton brothel owner’s appeal dismissed


By Alexandra Zabjek, edmontonjournal.com September 10, 2010 6:49 AM Read more: http://www.edmontonjournal.com/news/Edmonton+brothel+owner+appeal+dismissed/3502327/story.html#ixzz0z8SiHPdv

So if you read this blog... you learned something today. So you can go back to bed. Pat on the back. You've accomplished something.

Deep Breath... "Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so."

Last, first day of school. I feel confident. I feel on top of things. I feel Ok with everything. I feel comfortable with the world around me.

Then I stop. Then I think. Then I get scared shitless.

Its going to go by fast. Its going to be a lot of hard work. I'm going to fucking love it.

So I just have to remember:

Just because I'm older than a lot of people here, doesn't mean I'm older than everybody.
I can still have more fun than most of them... and really... they shouldn't concern me. I'm still going to rock this year. I'm going to get the most out of it. I'm cool, confident, collected....

As long as I don't panic. and remember a towel.

Wed-nes-day

First I said Tuesday... and here we are Wednesday. That's because Fernie was trouble. I should have known she would be.

"What happens in Fernie, Stays in Fernie..." my little Vegas of the North.

What I will say is:

People think they know me. They see the calm, collected, articulate, hermit that I have become in this cold northern city environment. They see me: the student, the government worker, the up and comer. I seem responsible. I look responsible. I wear glasses. Some friends who've known me for years, well they know different. Friends who've known me in travel mode, well they don't even know my responsible side. Ther's a crazy, irresponsible, random adventure loving, party girl inside of me. She's not hidden very deep, and she's up for anything. The people who know this is true, will read this and yawn. They know this isn't an exageration. They have stories of they're own they could tell about me. They probably won't say a thing though. They could be incriminated by association. The one's who read this and haven't seen this side of me.

Don't worry. You probably won't. You wouldn't believe me if I told you anway. You'll probably never witness it. You'll probably never meet her. Unless you come to Fernie. But if you do... you might not recognize me.

Because what happens in Fernie stays in Fernie...

Debaucher'ous Derby...Oh how I've missed you.

Entering the arena on the left we have my epically awesome roommate and

heterosexual-life-mate Bex James Lanman:

On the right we have my favorite town.... Fernie BC

Front and Centre are some amazing people:

All for the Love of Derby....

Lets talk again soon.... lets say...Tuesday?