Fucking Chicks.

So he says to me,


"I met this girl, you know the one who I said I was going on a date with, you know the other night when I said I couldn't go for beers?"

I said:

"Ok"


and he was like....

"Well you see. We went on a date. Everything was great. Everything was nice, and fun... and you know she was pretty quiet... but whatever. Then, fuck....
Let me be honest here.
She's Fuckin' terrible in bed."

so I said:

"Oh, Ok."

and he was like....

"Well what's the rule? What do I do. She's not a bad girl. She's not a bad person. She's just really terrible in bed and I never want to sleep with her again."

(at this point I just nodded)

and he was like....

"Well?"

(at this point i realized I was actually supposed to respond to this)

so I said:

"I don't think you have to call her if you don't want to. I mean you're obviously not interested in the girl and she's not a bad person, so i wouldn't worry about it. Why are you even asking me this anyway?"

and he was like...

"Well your a chick."



thanks. Every once and a while its nice to be reminded that I represent the opinions of an entire population.

Weathering the Storm.... grace? N/A

My eyes are glazed over.
I’m having trouble keeping my head up.
If I was submerged in water, I would drown, but I strangely feel like I’m submerged in gravy, like I can’t move very quickly, but everything around me is moving very fast.

I am in the eye of the storm.
No time to breathe.
No time to think.

But here I am.

kicking the ass out of this storm. for now... And as long as it doesn’t blow me over the edge, we’ll all be ok. I picture myself as the cow, caught in the tornado in the Wizard of Oz. I’ll be fine. Look’y me I’m still Mooooing. No power to do anything, except voice my complaints. And still, I’m flying away… who knows where I’ll land.

I aced everything I handed in yesterday, and I plan on acing everything I hand in today, and tomorrow, and Thursday and Tuesday, and….
I sell confidence and results.

But like the cow in the tornado, my success in life is entirely dependent on where I land. It’s a perilous journey and the only thing I have control over is my reaction. I pray I take this storm and ride it all the way to Vancouver Island, landing in the freezing cold pacific. Miss French will yank me from the water, Mags will grab me a towel, and K will pour me a beer. All I know for certain, is the storm is far from finished, and I know when it will end. Watch out world, in thirteen days, two hours and forty-two minutes this girl will be free. The storm will be behind me, and hopefully I landed somewhere safe, unbroken.

Until then, if you see me, hug me, offer me food and candy, and please don’t be mad at me if I bite, it’s not you… it’s the storm.

And in 13 days, two hours and forty-two minutes, please don’t judge me if I drink too much, or make an ass out of myself… I'll be celebrating life, and the ability to have one.

Green with envy.

She came home...

and now she's gone.

She's having fun in the Big Easy. Eating Crawfish, Jambalya, Red Beans and Rice. Listening to Jazz. Drinking her face off. Down by the water. Watching the world sink.

I'm happy for her.

But I'm also very very very very jealous.

Harper, keep on harping on.

My life for the past 24 hours has revolved around this article.

CBC News, “Killed climate change bill flawed: Harper,” November 17, 2010,

http://www.cbc.ca/politics/story/2010/11/17/senate-climate-bill.html, accessed on November 20, 2010.

Now I lay me down to sleep

Everything can be examined in isolation,

but nothing exists in isolation.

We are all a part of a system.


We are all in this together.
No matter how much we try and separate ourselves from it all.
We are what we eat.
We are what we do.
We are who we want to be.
Our actions speak louder.
Our inactions speak loudest.

Electricity through my fingers, one word at a time.

For a while now, I've felt numb.







I don't feel numb today.

I don't know what the answers are,
I don't know how to make life work.

But its pretty nice to wake up and feel alive.
Electricity is running through my fingers, my stomach is doing flippy floppys, my head is clear, my thoughts are positive.

For the first time in a while I actually think I can get it all done.
I think I can make it.
Sometimes, you have to be selfish and you have to let yourself take what you want. Sometimes, you have to roll over and miss your bus.
Sometimes, you have to just stop avoiding the world, and just start typing.

One word at a time, it will all get done one word at a time.

Life is supposed to be Silly.

Last night, I went out. I was irresponsible. I'm not meant for being a hermit. Maybe I am. No more rules. Are you dancing yet? Watch this:



Anytime you want to feel good.
Stop
Everything.

Life is too short to get all serious and not have a good time.


Wise Words Mr. Stephensen.... Wise words.